Weekly Results 9th October 2021

Swansea Golf Club Results 9th October 2021.

Today’s event was the first round of the Club Championships in all categories.

Winner on the Day   Christine Ring 57, Runner Up Danny Elmer 61, 3rd Howard Edgington 62.

Leaders of Club Championship 1st Round

                                    A Grade Ricky Dance 73, Ricky Wright 75, Peter Lea 75.

                                    B Grade Rod Smith 78, Howard Edginton 79, Michael Baxter 81.

                                    C Grade Ian Wallace 89, Danny Elmer 94, Stephen Mortimer 96

Nearest the Pin          6th/15th Matt Gall

Super Pin                   4th/13th Ricky Wright, 7th/ 16th Rod Smith

Birdie Bonus              Matt Gall        

Next Week                 3rd & 4th Rounds of the Club Championship will be played on                                                        Saturday and Sunday. Saturday only rounds may be played.

Wednesday 6th September 2021

Lady’s Mid-week Stableford

18-Holers                   Winner Di Sinclair 36, Runner Up Lyn Lyne 32, 3rd Joanna Whelan 31

9-Holers                     Winner Karen Moran 15, Runner Up Jennifer Whittaker 14, 3rd Pip Cardno 12.

Nearest the Pin          3rd Angela Barden, 4th Karen Moran, 7th Di Garcia, 8th Pat Hardcastle.

                                   

Chicken Run (Scores Only)

Wednesday,               Corry Van Den Broek 26, Steve Mortimer 31, Peter Dodge 31.

                                    Putts Mitchell Baxter 13.

Friday                        Christine Ring 27, Ian Johnson 28, Putts Ian Johnson 12

An ardent golfer dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. St. Peter tells the man he has lived an exemplary life and that he can go right in. The man asks, “St. Peter, where is the golf course?”
“I’m terribly sorry,” replies St. Peter, “but that’s one thing we don’t have here.”
The man turns and decides that he will see if the situation is any better in hell. On the road to hell, he is greeted by the devil who has already heard of the golfer’s rejection of heaven.
“This way, sir,” says the devil, “the finest tournament-quality 18 holes you are likely to find this side of Augusta, Georgia.”
The golfer looks around and agrees that it is the finest course he has ever seen and decides he’d rather spend eternity there than in heaven, so he signs up for the full package. “So,” he says to the devil, “why don’t you go get me some clubs and balls and I’ll have the game of my after-life.”
“I’m sorry, sir, we don’t have any.”
“What?” says the man. “No balls or clubs for a fine course like this?”
“No, sir,” says the devil fiendishly, “that’s the hell of it.”

Weekly Results 2nd October 2021

Swansea Golf Club Results 2nd October 2021.

Under grey and very damp skies the October Monthly Medal and the final of the Morris Family Memorial Trophy were contested.

Medal Winner           Ricky Dance 61, Runner Up Peter Lea 62, 3rd Darryl Down 63.

Nearest the Pin          4th/13th Jason Kerrison, 8th/17th Jason Kerrison

Super Pin                   7th/ 16th Tim Bond     

Morris Memorial      Tim Bond defeated Steve Mortimer

Next Week                 1st & 2nd Rounds of the Club Championship will be played on Saturday and Sunday. Saturday only rounds may be played.

Wednesday 29th September 2021

Lady’s Mid-week Monthly Medal Stroke

18-Holers                   Winner Alison Smith 66 c/b, Runner Up Joanna Whelan 66.

9-Holers                     Winner Karen Moran 27, Runner Up Jennifer Whittaker33 14.

Nearest the Pin          3rd Pat Hardcastle, 7th Jennifer Whittaker. 8th Jennifer Whittaker

                                   

Chicken Run (Scores Only)

Wednesday,               Peter Dodge 27, Darryl Down 28.5 Putts Howard Edgington 11.

Friday                        Curtis Miley 27.5 Putts Curtis Miley 14

Golf got its name because all of the other four-letter words were taken.

John and Bob were two of the bitterest rivals at the club. Neither man trusted the other’s arithmetic. One day they were playing a heated match and watching each other like hawks. After holing out on the fourth green and marking his six on the scorecard, John asked Bob, ”What’d you have?
Bob went through the motions of mentally counting up. “Six!” he said and then hastily corrected himself – ” No, no…. a five.”
Calmly John marked the scorecard, saying out loud “Eight!” “Eight?” Bob said, “I couldn’t have had eight.”
John said, “Nope, you claimed six, then changed it to five, but actually you had seven.”
“Then why did you mark down eight?” asked Bob.
John told him, “One stroke penalty, for improving your lie.”

Weekly Results 25th September 2021

Swansea Golf Club Result 25th September 2021.

A Grand Final field today contested a 4 person Ambrose, except for one team who had 5.    

Winners Jack Hardcastle, Christine Ring, Mitchell Baxter, Jim Morris, Darryl Down 47.5

Runners Up Peter Dodge, Val Kemp, Steve Dart, Shane Bartell 50.625

3rd Adam Wilson, Gavin Todd, Ray Flynn, Tim Bond 53

Nearest the Pin          4th/13th Jack Hardcastle, 3rd/12th Jack Hardcastle

Super Pin                   7th/16th Raymond Flynn

Correction from last Week’s Progressive results for FOBS after the 3rd Round:-

           Freycinet 489, Orford 537, Bicheno 466, Swansea 512        

Wednesday 22nd September 2021

Lady’s Mid-week Stableford

18-Holers                   Winner Sally Siepen 34 Runner Up Lyn Lyne 32 C/b, Di Sinclair 32.

9-Holers                     Winner Pip Cardno 16, Runner Up Ange Dixon 15, Helen Hall 14.

Nearest the Pin          18-holes 8th/17th Jan Darke 5th/14th Sally Siepen. 9-holers 4th Jane Cotton

                                    7th Jennifer Whittaker.

                                   

Chicken Run (Scores Only)

Wednesday,               Rod Smith 28.5, Barry Skeggs 29.5, Max Hall 30.5.

                                    Putts Jim Miley 11.

Friday                        Steve Mortimer 34. Putts Derek Ring 14.

Fred had tried to be particularly careful about his language as he played golf with his preacher. But on the twelfth hole, when he twice failed to hit out of a sand trap, he lost his resolve and let fly with a string of expletives. The preacher felt obliged to respond. “I have observed,” said he in a calm voice, “that the best golfers do not use foul language.” “I guess not,” said Fred, “what the hell do they have to bitch about?”

“I once played a course that was so tough, I lost two balls in the ball washer!”

Weekly Results 18th September 2021

Swansea Golf Club Result 18th September 2021.

A very large field contested Round 3 of the annual FOBS (Freycinet, Orford, Bicheno, Swansea) inter-club event which was played at the Freycinet Golf Club.

Results on the day Freycinet 169, Orford 177, Bicheno 146, Swansea 165.

Running Totals Freycinet 489, Orford 537, Bicheno 466, Swansea 512.

Swansea Men’s best Rod Smith 36, 2nd Ricky Wright.

Swansea Ladies best Lyn Lyne 32, 2nd Kathy Dance.

Next Week                

Wednesday 15th September 2021

Lady’s Mid-week Ambrose

18-Holers                   Winners Jo Whelan, Pat Hardcastle, Christine Ring 47.3.

                                    Runners Up Val Kemp, Sally Siepen, Alison Smith 50.5.

9-Holers                     Winners Jennifer Whittaker, Pip Cardno, Jane Cotton 28.5.

                                    Runners Up Clair Franklin, Judith Cleaver 35

Nearest the Pin          18-holes 6th/15th Val Kemp, 2nd/11th Alison Smith. 9-holers 7th Linden Harris

                                   

Chicken Run (Scores Only)

Wednesday,               Steve Mortimer 29, Peter Dodge 29, Mike Woolveridge 30.

                                    Putts Several on 13.

Friday                        Russell Dodge 27.5, Derek Ring 32.5, Len Evans 32.6

                                    Putts Shane Bartel 13,

           

What is the difference between a golfer and a fisherman?
When a golfer lies, he doesn’t have to bring anything home to prove it.

MacDermott and MacDuff were sitting in the clubhouse on a raw, blustery day, thawing their beards in front of the fireplace while freezing rain beat against the windows. The pair were silent for a long time over their whiskeys. Finally, MacDermott spoke, “That was quite a round of golf.”
“Aye,” MacDuff replied. “Same time next Saturday?”
“Aye,” said MacDuff, “weather permitting.”

Weekly Results 11th September 2021

Swansea Golf Club Result 11th September 2021.

In blustery conditions players competed in a stableford event Sponsored by the Bendigo Bank

Winner                       Jack Hardcastle 40     

Runner Up                 Matt Gall 37, 3rd Alvin Douglas 35 c/b, 4th Max Hall 35 c/b.

Nearest the Pin.         2nd/11th Jason Kerrison, 3rd/12th Matt Gall, 9th/18th Peter Coon.    

Super Pin                   4th/13th Shane Bartel, 7th/16th Matt Gall.       

Next Week                 3rd Round of FOBS at Freycinet. 9.30 for 10.00 start

Wednesday 8th September 2021

Lady’s Mid-week Stableford

18-Holers                   Winner Jo Whelan 35, Runner Up Val Kemp 31c/b, Lyn Lyne 21.

9-Holers                     Winner Judith Cleaver 17, Runner Up Jennifer Whittaker 16c/b,

                                    Alison Donaldson 16.

Nearest the Pin          18-holes 5th Kathy Dance, 8th Kathy Dance. 9-holers 4th Jane Cotton,

                                    7th Di Sinclair.

Chicken Run (Scores Only)

Wednesday,               Rick Dance 30, Howard Edgington 30, Corry Van Den Broek 31.

                                    Putts Howard Edgington 13, Corry Van Den Broek 13

Friday                        Matt Gall 26.5, Shane Nicholls 30.5, Rick Dance 30.5 Putts Matt Gall 12.

            To meet regulation standards, golf holes must have a diameter of 4.25 inches and a depth of 4 inches.Any more or less will make the hole non-regulation.

            The first handicap system was invented by a woman, Issette Pearson in 1893.The system levelled the playing field and allowed golfers who had less experience to play. It also allowed male and female players with mixed skills to compete.

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